Sorry to dissapoint you, it's not clitoris. In this post anyway.
Context. You know "within the text".
I really have no idea what's the problem with the simple idea that for a lot of things it's not a simple matter of good or bad, right or wrong, but of when, where, with whom and how.
I always thought this was something you learnt early in life: you used a different language when talking to your grandma compared to what languaged you used when talking to your mates. There's nothing bad about pooping, yet you don't do it of the sidewalk. Easy, isn't it?
And the there are the rules of communication. The simple recognition that in a given conversation about topic X, regardless of what X actually is, jumping in shouting "but what about Y"* makes you an asshole.
To make it easier for those who have problems with that idea:
In a conversation about starvation in Africa**, complaining about your lack of Parmesan cheese makes you an asshole because you compare your tiny woes with a real serious problem. That's easy.
Trickier: In a conversation about Parmesan cheese, jumping in telling people that this is trivial and they should really discuss starvation in Africa makes you an asshole, too. But aren't starving children still more important than cheese? Of course they are, but bringing them up in this context shows that the person actually gives a fuck about them. What such a person really wants is to tell people what to do, trying to shame them because they obviously ignore such great woes in the world. Such a person wants to get their halo glowing with a holier than thou attitude. That's what makes such a person an asshole.
*Quite often the formula Y=me is true.
**BTW, you can help, these are cool people who don't spend money on bibles
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