Mittwoch, 28. September 2011

7 things I'd like you not to do to my kids (or other people's kids)

1.) Do not touch
It's sad that I have to mention that, but really, please, don't touch. I don't touch you, a perfect stranger and you'd be rightly upset if I did. My children are perfect strangers to you, too, and just because they're short doesn't mean they feel comfortable with you patting them. Do you want to look like a creep?

2.) Do not feed
I sound like I was writing about zoo-animals, don't I? Another basic one. It's nice that you want to give them a treat. Just ask me, please. Maybe they are about to have dinner, maybe they just had a huge ice-cream cup. And while my kids might simply puke in the car, there are many kids around with allergies. Your cookie could be lethal.

3.) No, it's not okay
It's nice that you don't mind my kids screaming at the top of their voices or sitting down at your table in the restaurant. I really appreciate that there are still some people out there who have a high tolerance for kids. But honestly, that's a bit too much. I'm trying to teach them some respect for other people's needs and you're not helping.

4.) No, they're not dolls
I know, they're cute. But please, can't you compliment them on something apart from their looks? Come on. You're an intelligent adult, you can come up with something better. You don't want to teach them that looks are the only thing that matters. Do you want them to judge you by that standard?

5.) De-du-du-du, de-da-da-da is only cool when sung by the police
Can you please talk normaly? How do you think they're going to learn language? Surely not by baby-talk. Especially not since they're already fluent in it. It only makes you look stupid.

6.) Wear your big-kid pants
So they're not talking to you? Believe me, they understood you the first time. If they don't want to answer you it's their choice. If that offends you, well, that is of course your choice. But I thought you wanted to be the adult.

7.) Yes, you're a stranger
No, of course you're not one of those strangers who give kids candy and then want to do evil things. You're only one of those other strangers who just give kids candy. Honestly, how are the kids supposed to know that, or for that matter, how am I supposed to know that? Because the bad kind of strangers and the good kind of strangers look exactly alike until the point when they don't. Don't make me worry about what kind you belong to. And please accept that my children will err on the side of safety. Oh, and for candy, please read #2 again.


Anonym hat gesagt…

"Especially not since they're already fluid in it. "

That would be fluent, not fluid.

Giliell hat gesagt…

Ah, yes, thank you

Anonym hat gesagt…

Seriously disturbing. I never understood why some adults act as if they were mentally retarded, towards kids. I did not understand when I was one myself, and being almost 30, I STILL do not understand it.
E.g. you are not even allowed to even feed other people's pets, feeding children candy makes no sense at all.
And the stupid sense of entitlement and rudeness some adults seem to have towards children just because of their age, so wtf.

Hunt hat gesagt…

I've heard that Germans aren't exactly touchy feely, which probably explains why this seems a little...anal, shall we say.

Monado hat gesagt…

Better to tell them not to talk to strangers when you're not around. I remember being two and glaring silently at some nice man who said something to me when I was out with my mother, because she'd told me not to talk to strangers. OK, maybe I was three. Staying out of arm's reach is also good. And maybe it shouldn't be just strangers. but where to draw the line?

Giliell hat gesagt…

That's the thing again, like with rape-culture and women. We teach our children safety rules. They have to watch themselves, not the predators.
But the post wasn't originally about child-predators and child abuse. It's about the "normal" people, the ones who'd never harm a child willingly, who want to be friendly and nice and kind and who therefore think that they are above being creepy and outright rude.
Thinking about it, it's the exact same shit women get from "wellmeaning" people.